Am I polyamorous? Am I an agnostic? Am I meant to act on Broadway?

Media and pop culture would have us desperately attempting to answer these questions. They pressure us to fit into defined boxes and decide which camp we should belong in.

Yet these “Am I?” questions can teach us something valuable.

After spending two decades as a life coach helping clients (and myself) answer these very questions, I can start by telling you what you are not.

First, you are not your beliefs. You are not your fears. You are not your defense mechanisms. These are mental constructs and have little to do with who you actually are at the core of your being.

Second, science has proven that the real you is not even your body. Your body is simply the way you inhabit a life on Earth. It speaks little to the actual truth of you.

In truth, the truth of who you are is embedded in the truth of what you are.

Evidence points to the soul existing beyond death. That soul didn’t come from nothing. It came from everything. You are a creation. You were gifted life. You were gifted free will. You are a child of God. That is what you are.

Problems arise in our lives when we attempt to define who we are on what we are not. Especially our emotional investment into external extrapolations. Am I an atheist? Am I a catholic? Am I a democrat or a republican? None of those external factors actually matter when it comes to your true identity.

Why? They aren’t the truth. They are mental constructs made up by people trying to locate their identity and nothing more.

What happens when you base your identity on a mental construction instead of the truth? You get to feel empty and lost, or you get to feel like a slave to your projections, justifying why this is you. Symptoms include: self-doubt, insecurity, imposter syndrome, ego-driven behaviors, depression.

What happens when you base your identity on the truth? You get to build an inner and outer life that is rich, rewarding, and strong. Symptoms include: self-trust, hope, joy, confidence, wisdom, and fortitude.

What happens when you locate your truth (actual truth, not the false mental construct)?

This is where life gets fun! Once you accept what you are, you gain the gift and privilege to activate who you are.

God has placed hundreds of possibilities within you. You can activate integrity, grace, compassion, love, and generosity. You can activate a relationship with your creator. You can activate your life purpose. You can activate your gifts. You can heal from all the falsities the world placed upon you. Those aren’t true and they aren’t you.

You are intelligently designed.

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth."- Psalm 139:14–15

You are valuable.

"So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them." – Genesis 1:27

You are worthy.

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

You are whole and complete as you are.

"For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse." -Romans 1:19–20

You are an extension of God.

"For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible... all things have been created through him and for him." -Colossians 1:16

You have been gifted everything you need.

"This is what the Lord says—your Redeemer, who formed you in the womb: I am the Lord, the Maker of all things, who stretches out the heavens, who spreads out the earth by myself."

What do these “Am I?” questions have to teach you? They teach you to start with your origin first. You came from: “I Am.”

What does the truth about who you actually are have to teach you?

That is for you to explore.